Fathers Resources International

'Virtual' Visits the future of Parenting Time
Location: BlogsDivorced Dad Daily    
Posted by: Danny Guspie 9/23/2007
Virtual Parenting Time

I thought this might be a troubling development. Article on long distance visitation.'Virtual' Visits Pushed in Several States The problem is that we are now seeing Judges have one more reason to say that Mom moving away is not a problem for Dads and Kids because they can "visit" over the internet. Ever tried hugging your kid through a computer screen? It's just not the same thing....

But then this is the current state of the law - Move-away's are a fact of life, this tool could help maintain the bond. And that's the point here. And it's a father who has faced this issue that came up with the solution.

It's up to us to manage what change means well, be it in our families or on the legislative floor, or in our arguments before the Court. When I first posted my comments, I was not in favour of this, because of what Judge's do. Why make it easier.

However that's the wrong question. And I have come to realize this in speaking with the dad who came up with this concept.

Judges will make move-away rulings we don't like. And we owe it to our kids to whatever is necessary to help them make those changes - this is just another parenting tool to do just that.

Last but not least - in speaking with that Dad, it was heartwarming to see another Dad who had grappled with the hard issues and came up with a solution and has done the hard work.

It's good to know that there are Dads out there who do get it and are prepared to do what is necessary to remain involved. And in his case, he even moved to where his child relocated.

But he's still at it, despite having an answer for his own situation.

Nice to meet another "Son of the Liberation..."

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Re: 'Virtual' Visits the future of Parenting Time    By Jimmy on 3/1/2006
Interesting. I had just seen something about this recently and I was looking at a website where they help get these video connections set up. I was thinking about Dads who are already at a distance from their kids and it seemed like a good thing. Now, I'm not so sure. Your observation that this could make it easier for mothers to move long disatnces away from fathers is something I hadn't thought of.

I don't think anyone can turn back the clock and make these virtual visits technically impossible. Who'd want to, anyways? But I do think we need to guard against court saying that a virtual visit is the same as a real, live, in-person visit.

It looks like you've got an interesting blog shaping up here, Danny. I'll be checking back often.

Re: 'Virtual' Visits the future of Parenting Time    By danny on 3/1/2006
Thanks for the comment. Every thing in life has a pro and a con. My concerns stem from what I see the Courts do - Justify a Mother's mobility which rarely has anything to do with what's best for a child - The ability to have a meaningful relationship with Mom and Dad is what is best for children and society needs to encourage that. When you have a child, life no longer is "all about you" - it’s about your kids, even when you divorce. They must come first, and that means your rights are subsumed by theirs. In my opinion, having been a child of divorce.

Thanks for the comment and visiting - come back often for updates, tactics, strategies, free resources, meeting information and help.

Danny Guspie - Executive Director
Fathers Resources International

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