Good People & People of Faith,
The season of Lent is meant to be a time of introspection & penance aspreparation for the celebration of Easter. I know many of us are notreligious, but perhaps some personal reflection might help our reformefforts. I have included some anonymous FEEDBACK from you regardingthese personal issues.I certainly think the F-4-J folks have shown courage by their actions(and some may soon be facing jail time. Imagine that!).
I also tellyou someone else I have respect for, a mother named Diane Booth whotook her son and ran off to Canada. Why?Against her wishes her child was being medicated with Ritalin forsupposed ADHD. Diane thought it was causing serious health problemsthat would destroy his future. She tried to work through the system,but nobody listened (we can all relate to that).
Time was of theessence and she saw the boy she knew slipping away. She ran with himto Canada for a while, but they were eventually captured and returnedto the US. She was jailed for a while. Imagine that!http://www.msnusers.com/FreeVincentBoothDiane's email address:
ChildRescue2006@aol.com
[ Now please, have I confirmed that all this is really true, and that Diane is certified good-hearted, and not secretly a vampire? No. But please just evaluate her actions based on what I said.]What would you have done? Who's at fault if your child suffersserious injury while in the care of the 'system'?
Taking Personal Moral Responsibility
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I get a LOT of email and hear some pretty horrendous stories. If youhaven't been there, please visit our Hall of Shame page,http://www.AKidsRight.Org/shame.htm Sometimes I wonder about the people behind the messages I get. Theydescribe horrific physical or sexual abuse happening to their child.They describe what an absolute monster either the other parent orsocial worker is... and you want to know something?
The worse theymake it sound, the more I wonder.... Do they really believe that or are they just turning up the volumebecause they think that will work? But even more so I ask why aren'tthey taking action to try to save their child? Your child is beingsexually abused and you are sending me an email message? You areblaming the system ... the other parent ... the judge ... the socialworker, but what are YOU doing?
Many of you think a 'Court Order' absolves you of your personal moralresponsibility for the welfare of your children? The Judge put my kidin an abusive home, what can I do? Why do I like Diane. Her actions were consistent with what she wassaying and she had the courage to take action. Done with a "wellformed conscience" (search that on Google) it is also a GOOD act.
Introspection - a reality check for all of us.
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Some of the stories involve an 'other' parent who is into drinkingand/or drugs. I really wonder about those? Did this other parentjust start doing drugs, or were they doing it before when you hada 'relationship' and it didn't bother you?I wonder about the children that were the accidental products ofone-night stands. Neither future parent was thinking of a child atthe moment -- they just wanted to get their groin tickled!These are perhaps easy for many of us to criticize, but what of themore subtle failures?
The confidence and Faith we lacked ourselves,that led to poor situations for our ourselves and consequently for ourchildren. The times we were so caught up in 'something else', thatwe failed to respond to those close to us?And certainly, for all of us who have new found 'righteousness' aboutthe dismal state of Family Law ...
How many of us were concernedenough to pay attention or contact legislators when these laws werebeing passed years ago? We did nothing, it hadn't happenedto us yet? But now we have no patience with legislators?Sometimes I'd like to hear someone say, "and I wasn't perfect either,I made a few mistakes which may have contributed to this..."
I feelmore sympathetic for those folks, more inclined to believe...I am able to feel much more compassion for others, when I reflect onall the things I could have done differently. When I embrace the factthat part of the reason my son Domenic has been through so much pain,is based on my past failings....
The Past is Past
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To continually regret past errors is destructive and foolish -- but sois pretending they don't exist. We become more able to work &sacrifice for reform when we acknowledge our past failings and usethem as motivation to work for the future. It also helps improve ourcredibility and we don't shreeeek as much at the other parent and thefolks in the system.
Your FEEDBACK...
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